Ordinary life does not interest me. I seek only the high moments. I am in accord with the surrealists, searching for the marvelous.
When I look at the large green iron gate from my window it takes on the air of a prison gate. An unjust feeling, since I know I can leave the place whenever I want to, and since I know that human beings place upon an object, or a person, this responsibility of being the obstacle when the obstacle lies always within one's self.
You live in this, sheltered, in a delicate world, and you believe you are living. Then you read a book, or you take a trip, or you talk with Richard, and you discover that you are not living, that you are hibernating...Some never awaken. They are like the people who go to sleep in the snow and never awaken. But I am no longer in danger because my home, my garden, my beautiful life do not lull me.
I enjoy the power of his writing, the ugly, destructive, fearless cathartic strength. This strange mixture of worship of life, enthusiasm, passionate interest in everything, energy, exuberance, laughter, and sudden destructive storms baffles me. Everything is blasted away: hypocrisy, fear, pettiness, falsity. It is an assertion of instinct....It is not madness. It is an effort to transcned the rigidities and the patterns made by the rational mind.
The extent of my innocence would be incredible to him.
Anais Nin
Loneliness is such a sad affair
And I can hardly wait
to be with you again
What to say
to make you come again,
Come back to me again
And play your sad guitar
L. Russel
What if I could never be what you thought?
Why should I care? But I do care. I care about everything.
(Anais)
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